Monday, April 27, 2009

Mini Vans hate Harleys..lane splitting in Wal-Mart

Mini Vans are the downfall of society..once you have to move on to that point in life your screwed for next like eighteen years..Life's over so you you take it out on those who experience freedom..or the damn kids were tossing shitballs in the back so you just don't have time to watch where your going..

Some my ask Rat where the fuck does this come from..Well it started years ago but built up..like bad case of gas..Just out of the chute yesterday I'm doing the first good set of curves..no turns damn it and round the corner comes mama in my lane, daddy picking his nose and yelling at her and eight ungly rugrats screaming..there may of been a dog too but as we past I was more worried about keeping my ass from becoming part of the thing..Then I swear I heard them laughing as they went by and someone saying gee ma you almost got another one..Mini Vans Hate Harleys

Now there is nothing cool about a mini van..can't toss a set of 20's on it, slam it and cruise..I have nightmares of Dirty Ernie pulling up in one..I have suffered greatly at what would be worse..a honda or a mini van..either one is a toss off the bro list..I think they suck the testosterone out of men who drive them..hell it sends them to the passanger seat..you drive ma..damn..

So I got a new sport..I love lane splitting..I live in the sticks and have been known to ride to Fresno, sit at the AMPM by the on ramp and wait for the right time to jump on and go like hell..The echo of the straights bouncing off cars at six inches is enough to make you..(use your own imagination here)..It rocks..seeing the face as you blast by with your best shit eating grin going should be a fucking Visa commercial..Back to the topic..

Wal-Mart..Call me a commie but we got one of the new super wally worlds..this puppy is huge..and always full..Here's the deal..you can lane split in those tight isles..you can bump draft the dude in the electric cart..You smack one with a child seat and know one will ever catch on.nudge, tap, cut off nothing is off limits.Never stop or look at the end of isles..can't get hurt, well bad..Unless of course your doing teams then it could get hairy..one on one race..start in the pharmacy end up in the deli..damn near a mile of good fun and exercise..Damn I better go for a ride..Later

Rat

5 comments:

mq01 said...

oh oh...

ratone said...

Can you say rat rant five times real fast..LOL...got more coming..riding season just got cut short, elbow surgery..damn it

ratone said...

Here is a short practice run through the fruit and veggies,,I was being tracked by security by this time..just couple of small taps..and the damn kid was to quick..LOL

FLHX_Dave said...

Why is this making me laugh my ass off? LOL...why?

ratone said...

So Dave,, you make to walmart today..wanna race..