Tuesday, April 28, 2009

how i got Certified Insane and Sectioned

so it's the 20 feb 1978 8-15pm me and a freind leave a Cousins house........."as i awake and my Eyes start to focus I notice the big white light in the Ceiling....eh!!! i havn't got one of those in my Bedroom ???" then I notice all the metalwork on the Bed ? so being shit scared I yell my head off.......a Vison of Uniform appears it's aNurse??? w.t.f is goin on she tells me to calm down and am i in pain? for some reason i can't lift either of my arms or move my head ? Uh oh deep shit time . 

So they jab my right thigh with a needle and things go a bit weird (as if the Big white light wasn't weird enuf) 

A while later i'm once again sort of awake but know there is a Man with a white coat !!! oh fuck here we go ...... 

he tells me he's the Ward Doctor I just plainy ask wot the hells going on ? well he says you've been involved in a serious accident "no shit" i say ok Doc why can't i move my head Doc says your Neck and your Back is Broken !!! Fucking hell thinks me but Doc i can feel my legs espcially when they keep stabbing me with needles yes your quite lucky your spinal cord isn't Damaged "great thinks me so when will i be able to walk ? maybe a year or so your lower Left Leg is Broken in 17 places !!!......oh fuck......and your left thigh is broken just above the knee.......ok ok Doc so why can't i move my left arm there's only a small Bandage on that.......well your left upper arm is broken and so is your Shoulder.......me "any other good news?" well your right arm is also Broken.......jeezus i can't even wipe me own arse then 

at this point i'm thinking did they get the number of the Truck that ran me over then stopped and reversed over me again........ 

Doc "do you know what day it is ?" 

me yup it's Tuesday 

Doc' "it's thursday , do you know what the date is ?" 

me well it was the 20th feb on monday so if it's thursday it'll be the 23rd 

Doc "well  it's March the 18th" 


Doc "you've been in a Coma for approx 4 weeks" 

Doc " you've been in a Motorcycle Accident" 

me "get me a Fucking Phone ? how bad is my bike it was only 3 months old from new for fuck sake" 

one phone call later i had calmed down till he mentioned the bike being smashed up i was fine 

Later that same afternoon anutha Doctor turned up from the Phycho Ward to test me then decide what Drugs I needed 

It seems they thought i was a bit Mental hey ho 

Me Mum came an visitied me later and the Doctor explained that the Pcycho Dept had Sectioned me for 28 Days under the Mental Health Act , i just lay there pissing myself laughing thinking you assholes just don't understand as for the 28 day section like i'm really bothered about that i mean i'm gonna be stuck in the Hospital for up to 12 months anyhow whilst all the bits i broke mend 

Mum was like why the hell did they section you ? me well it seems to them i wasnt upset at all when they told me how fucked i was but when they mentioned my Motorcycle was fucked up and i started yelling and screaming about my bike they thought it was strange . 

Mum thought it was strange aswell ,go figure that eh 

1 comment:

mq01 said...

wow, pug, holy shit!!! can you imagine what would have happened if they "showed" you the bike instead... ;)
glad you're alive and well pug!!!